Brittan Bailey, 22, Stanford senior, Honolulu, Hawaii

What was it like growing up in Hawaii where it is totally socially acceptable to wear a bikini almost anywhere? Are people more self conscious because everyone is practically naked?

First of all, it really isn't socially acceptable to wear a bikini everywhere without some sort of cover-up (it is discouraged in stores, restaurants, etc.)--but in my house, on the beach, and in the car with the surfboards piled on the racks, especially in the summertime--wearing a swimsuit was second nature.

I loved growing up in my swimsuit. As a kid I had a million bikinis in a million different styles and colors and when I wasn't wearing one I had one nearby just in case we stopped by the beach for a quick dip. It didn't seem abnormal to me.

In my younger years I never felt self-conscious because I was comfortable wearing a bikini and grew up wearing one. I was also really skinny and athletic throughout my childhood and was not in the least ashamed of my body. Therefore, I didn't really think about it.

We had swimming units in school for P.E. and people would always notice the girls who wore bikinis vs. one-pieces--I was definitely a bikini wearer. In the awkward middle school years it was fashionable to wear board shorts with your swimsuit--and there would be those that wore one-pieces with board shorts, one-pieces, bikinis with board-shorts, and bikinis. In high school almost everyone started wearing bikinis.

At my high school eating disorders were rampant: and that was a product of being at a competitive prep school in which most people strove for well-rounded perfection, and a product of the fact that our bodies are constantly on display and girls are constantly comparing themselves to each other consciously and sub-consciously. People do that with clothes on, you can only imagine how it is without any clothes. I had friends who skipped meals right before getting in a swimsuit--preparing their bodies to be on display. I never did that--it's not in my personality--but I definitely witnessed it. I was never the skinniest girl out of my friends, but I was healthy and happy.

In high school I still felt really comfortable, but became more aware of how my body looked--for I did wear a bikini in every season, revealing every flaw. I ran cross country, track, and played tennis so I was very active and wish today that I looked like I did in a bikini back then. Looking back, most of us were extremely thin in Hawaii--and a lot of that is genetic--there are a lot of Asians and Hapa people, and in general (in an extremely generalized statement) that usually makes for smaller people, in height and weight. I was always on the taller size at a towering 5'6".

Do you feel you need to constantly work on your body so that it will look good in a bikini when you're home?

I am definitely way more self-conscious today, a senior in college, about my body then when I was living in Hawaii. Part of that is that I have put some weight since I came to the mainland (a result of unhealthier eating habits, not having structured exercise regiments from sports practice, and also simply growing older), and part of it is because I know when I go home I will have to wear a swimsuit and will be judged in it.

Everyone is very judgmental about people who go to college and come back fat--and it is so easy to see changes when you are in a swimsuit. And I'm not going to avoid being in a swimsuit; I love surfing and I love the beach. So I know that when I go home my bikinis are unearthed. I currently own about 20.

I think I am most fearful about what my mom thinks about me when I come home--and I hate wearing a bikini in front of her because I can see her size me up and down to see how my body has changed. She always comments if I look skinnier from the last time she saw me, or if I am looking a little "rounder around the edges." My friends also judge each other, and I am guilty of this as well. It's unfortunate but it is also natural.

Therefore, when I know I will be going home, I do think about shaping up and trying to eat healthier in preparation to wear a swimsuit. I'm not always successful, but it definitely remains in the back of my head. I work out a lot in general, so my exercise routine doesn't change, but I am more conscious of what I put in my mouth when I know I am going home. Unfortunately, the more I think about it, the more I eat...so I probably am better off not dwelling on it.

Up here (at Stanford) I don't think about my weight nearly as much. I don't have to wear a swimsuit all the time, first off. But also, I am not "big" here. Honestly I usually find myself on the skinnier side even though I don't think I am skinny. At home I am on the larger side, and I am aware of this.

Do you ever get pressured to look a certain way? Why? By whom?

As stated before, I am pressured to look a certain way by my family and my friends at home especially. My sister is the same height as me, but she is much thinner. She is also 4 years younger. But I know I am constantly being compared to her. I am most wary about what my Mom thinks, because she has always been extremely thin herself. She is also 5'6" and I am reminded that she "never weighed more than 100 lbs until college." My sister barely weighs 100 lbs.

For my body type this is unrealistic and I realize that. But it also draws greater attention to body image. My friends feel the same pressures that I do to look a certain way, especially in our bikinis--but it's not that they/we knowingly put pressure on each other, it is that if someone looks better than you, you notice that. If they look like they have put on weight, you notice that too. Ultimately this contributes to the way you see your own self.

So in the past, bikinis were tailored to women's bodies. Do you feel like people now make their bodies fit the bikini, rather than finding a bikini that fits their bodies?

Yes. I have even caught myself saying "that person should NOT be allowed to wear that on the beach. . ." It's terrible, I admit it. But as a size A cup person who is roughly a size 4, I have the privilege of being able to go into a bikini boutique and find something that fits. I know this is not the case for many. One of my friends is a double D and has the hugest problem of finding a bikini top that fits appropriately. The selection is much smaller--bikinis just aren't catered to that size category. There are many different styles of bikinis, like boy-short bottoms and tankinis, halters and hipsters, more coverage and less coverage, but in general girls are extremely aware that no matter what style they choose, their body will be on display and they try to make their body more bikini-wearable.

Last, Do you think that Britney Spears has impacted the way girls look at their bodies?

Yes. I remember her performance on MTV several years ago where she wore the nude diamond-studded crop-top and pants and thinking, man, I wish I had a body like that. It didn't change my lifestyle in any way, shape, or form, but I know it has had an effect on others. Moreover, I think that many worry that she sets a standard for what guys like in a woman's body--and for many that is just unrealistic.

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